Homegirl: *Meets guy that she reallyyyy likes*
Guy: “So why are you single?”
Okay kids, adults, and magnificent unicorns. Everyone sit around and listen to the tale of homegirl and how she ended up single, single.
Before heading into the tale of homegirl, let’s ask: why is being an adult and single essentially equivalent to having some type of disease? And clawwwwd, if you happen to be single AND childless AND over the age of 25 it’s a deadly disease. Like you must find your husband and get to poppin’ them children out pronto. But anyways, on to the tale…
This story begins with homegirl as a young beautiful girl. Throughout grade school and high school homegirl kept the attention of her admirers near and far (thanks to social media). Homegirl knew she was pretty yet she was very humble. However, homegirl grew up in a community that chastised young girls that were being admired by boys. The type of community that would blame the little girl for being slapped on her butt by a little boy because she was wearing “a skirt/shorts that were too short.” The type of community featuring a school’s dress for little girls that included: no spaghetti strap shirts, no shorts/skirts that rose above the knee, no v cut shirt, no dresses that were too form fitting, no pants that emphasized your curves (even if you were only 12 years old), no makeup, etc, etc, etc. Meanwhile the little boys within the same community were free to wear whatever they wanted, sorry, except for muscle shirts.
Homegirl wasn’t allowed to openly have boyfriends until high school. In the meantime, between time, society had taught homegirl everything she needed to know about dating. The lessons about dating were ingrained in her via television and gossip sites. Society taught homegirl to pick one man and stay with him for as long as she possibly could despite how she was being treated behind closed doors. Society scolded the women who dated multiple men and homegirl wouldn’t dare date multiple men and risk being called everything but her name. Homegirl was taught to keep her legs closed, tied with a knot and if she had children before she was married she would have the Scarlett letter of society. Oh and homegirl definitely wasn’t taught how to spot the red flags a man displayed in the early parts of the relationship. She was learning as she dated and she continued to learn throughout her college years.
Now homegirl is twenty something and more single than a dollar bill. No husband, no kids, just her, herself, and she. And people have the nerve to look at her like she’s crazy. TUH. Homegirl is simply following the rules that society laid out for her: as a woman you must be monogamous, do not reveal too much skin within the public eye, be submissive to your man, don’t drink/smoke that’s not ladylike, don’t be too strong of a woman, don’t give it up too quick, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Then something happened. Homegirl could no longer force herself to fit into the mold provided by society. Homegirl wasn’t happy being somebody she wasn’t. Homegirl didn’t play that “damsel in distress role”. Homegirl was the complete opposite. She was a strong, black woman. Full of ambition and otherworldly thoughts and desires. She was determined. She dressed however she wanted. She showed skin whenever she felt like it. She was educated. She spoke on how she felt in a sensible manner. She was the complete opposite of submissive. Or maybe, she hasn’t met a man stronger than her that she could be submissive to.
Homegirl stopped forcing relationships that weren’t ever going to work and became stingy with her love. She stopped focusing on finding a husband and started focusing more on finding herself. She began giving herself the love that she craved from a man. She took herself out on dates and bought herself gifts. She looked at herself in the mirror every chance she got and complimented herself. “Girl you are beautiful. Girl you are smart. Girl you a bad ass btch!” Homegirl fell deeper and deeper in love with herself on the daily. This is the type of sht society should’ve been teaching her and other little girls. Simply, how to love yourself in all of its glory.
Homegirl began realizing how powerful she felt practicing self-love. With that power she began to manifest the relationships that she desired. Starting with the most important person – herself. She wrote out a list manifesting the type of relationship she wanted with herself. Then she began slowly introducing the manifestation of the friends that she wanted, husband that she wanted, family relationships that she wanted. She carefully articulated her words so melodically to reflect exactly what she wanted in each kind of relationship. She craves to be surrounded and nurtured by other spiritual beings with goodness and kindness oozing from their auras. Homegirl knew that she would attract what she desired.
Self-love is the highest frequency that attracts everything you want.@deionpage on Instagram
As homegirl became more comfortable with loving and displaying her true self, she began attracting people that complimented her. The kind of people who supported her journey and provided her with a loving community to just be herself. The glow of her aura could be felt from many miles away and fended off anyone with ill intentions. Anybody that was with the sh*t seemingly created their own distance without any conflict. Some people eventually faded out of homegirl life completely.
Homegirl is okay with being in her twenties and single because homegirl is actively becoming the best version of herself to date. And homegirl is only getting better everyday.
And that is why homegirl is single. Okay, sir?